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Wordcount: 371
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People Are Really Messed Up
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And audio message was left on a Jack in the Box answering machine by the restaurant manager, who, on the way to work, witnessed an automobile accident involving a guy with “a white shirt and a cigarette hangin’ out of his mouth” and “four ol’ ladies in an Impala.” Within a few seconds, he begins describing the horrid situation, in which the four old ladies, most likely believing the man to be a threat, begin to attack the man, beating the living crap out of him. His southern origins are clear in his descriptions in that the ladies were “cattle proddin’” with an umbrella (emphasis on the “um”) and “tomahawkin’” him. When the ladies first spray a bottle of pepperspray on the man, the manager’s first reaction is l
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